Nothing's Fair When It Comes To Love
by YouCouldBeHappy11
Summary: Elena's made her choice. But so has Damon. "I'll help you transition. I'll help you learn how to hunt. I'll do whatever it is you need me to do until you're ready. But the minute that time comes, I'm gone. I get the hell out of Mystic Falls for good."


**AN: Hey loves! Welcome to my first Delena fanfic. Let me warn you, it's not fluffy and not lovey-dovey either, but I thought it was necessary. I have a lot of pent up frustration with this couple and this was definitely therapeutic for me to write. It features an angry Damon Salvatore, and we all know how hot _that_ is, so read on, my babes. I think you'll like it. Well, I hope you do! Lemme know.**

* * *

Damon Salvatore lay perfectly still, his body rigid as his eyes wandered around the tiny room he was currently occupying. His gaze landed on a small picture carefully taped to the owner's mirror and a small smile broke out on his face. God, he remembered that day almost perfectly. It had been a Sunday, he recalled, and while Stefan had been off draining every body in a 20 mile radius, the two of them had been bending over backwards trying to find him. He liked to call those days, the ones where Stefan wasn't around, the 'Golden Era,' simply because he had had the young girl all to himself. It was selfish, but spending time with his brother's girlfriend had always been one of his favorite past times. He was bothering her, as always, and as she sat on his bed, looking through newspaper articles, he flopped down beside her and snapped a picture of the two of them. Her face had been caught somewhere between surprise and 'Damon I'm going to kill you,' and although she had claimed to hate it, here it was, hanging in her room, surrounded by a million other pictures of her and the people she was closest to.

That was the thing about Elena Gilbert; she was always doing these little things that surprised you, and in his case, made you fall even more in love with her. He groaned loudly, quickly shaking the thought from his head. That's not why he was here. He was here because he needed to talk to her before he changed his mind. It had only been a few short hours since she had awoken, gasping for air as she took in the last few breaths she ever would as a human. She hadn't turned yet, but he knew she would. She couldn't leave Jeremy, not after he'd already lost everyone he had ever cared about, and it was a relief in a way. He would never in a million years wish this life on even his worst enemy, but the thought of a world without Elena was almost too much to bear. It had been downright torture for him, seeing her wake up, her face confused and slightly terrified until she realized what must have happened.

The pain he saw reflected in her eyes then was even worse than the previous emotions, and he wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around her and hold her until they both woke up from the terrible nightmare they seemed to be in. But the first words out of her mouth were 'Stefan,' and as his brother rushed to her side, it was then he realized Elena had made her choice, and in return, he was supposed to leave town.

And he planned to. He was going to pack up every item he owned and then drive. Drive until Mystic Falls, and the girl that would never want him, were far behind. He wouldn't leave yet, though. He would help her with the transition, help her decide that she should be on human blood and not that wimpy animal shit Stefan was always drinking, and then, when she had finally adjusted to her new life, he would get the hell out of dodge.

As he contemplated whether he should go to Paris or Rome first, someone quietly cleared their throat behind him, startling him out of his thoughts. He quickly jumped off the bed he had been laying on and turned to face the person that was now standing a few feet before him. Damon smiled slightly at the sight of her, and it pissed him off to no end that he was still completely head over heels for her, even after she had picked Stefan. Again.

Elena felt like crying when she saw the elder Salvatore. Earlier, at the hospital, he had rushed out so quickly she hadn't even been able to say a word to him. "Damon," she breathed. "Hi."

It was so good to see her alive that Damon had to physically fight the urge to run to her and touch every single inch of her beautiful body. "Elena," he said, smiling weakly.

"I'm so glad you're here," she cried, running to him and throwing her arms around him in the tightest hug he had ever received. If it hadn't been for the words that had been ringing in his ears for the past 24 hours-'I love him, Damon. He came into my life at a time when I needed someone and I fell for him instantly. No matter what I feel for you, I never un-fell for him"-Damon would have hugged her back. But those words, the words that he was desperately trying to forget, kept him in check. Elena wanted his brother, and like she had said countless times before, she always would.

Elena could feel Damon's body stiffen beneath her grasp and frowned slightly. She untangled herself from him and took a step backwards. "Are you okay?" she asked, mentally scolding herself as soon as the words left her mouth. Of course he wasn't okay. Nothing was okay. "Look, I know this isn't what we planned," she mumbled. "I never. . .I never wanted this."

She looked to the floor as tears burned behind her eyes and threatened to spill over. "But it happened, okay?" she said, taking a deep breath. "And there's nothing we can do about it. I'm going to drink the blood Stefan is out getting me and then the two of you will help me through this. We're going to be fine, Damon. Nothing's going to change."

Damon looked at Elena as if she had grown a second head. Was she crazy? Of course things were going to change! How could they not? And why was she so sure he was going to help her through this? She sounded so confident, like she actually believed everything was going to be okay, and it was pissing him off to monumental proportions until he realized that she was probably right. Everyone would flock to her side and treat her like the damsel in distress he knew damn well she wasn't. They would fawn over her to make sure she was okay, and then they would baby her and baby her until she was ready to accept her knew life. The thought made him cringe, not only because he knew she was strong enough to take care of herself, but because he knew this is exactly what she would expect from them all. Damon scoffed. Yeah fucking right. There was going to be one less person on her 'Help Me, I'm So Pathetic' list and it was going to be him.

"Let me be clear about something, Elena," he said, his voice stone cold and void of any emotion. "I'll help you transition. I'll help you learn how to hunt. I'll do whatever it is you need me to do until you're ready. But the _minute_ that time comes, I'm gone. I get the hell out of Mystic Falls for good."

Elena began to protest, but he quickly cut her off. "No. You don't get a say in what I do, and you certainly don't get to try and talk me out of this. You made your choice, Elena. I get it. And you know, as much as I would just love to spend an eternity watching you be with my saintly brother who can apparently do no wrong in your eyes, I'm over it. Three fucking years was long enough."

Elena's eyes flooded with tears and her voice took on an almost desperate tone. Where was this coming from? He sounded so angry and she couldn't figure out why. She knew that what she had said on the phone had been harsh, but what else was she supposed to say? 'I love you, but I'm going back to Stefan because I know he'll always be there for me and won't break my heart?' That wasn't much better than what she really had said. "Damon, can we just talk about this? Please? You know I. . ."

"I swear to god if you say you 'care about me' one more time I will leave right now and never look back," he said sharply. "I know you care about me, Elena, which is why you have to let me go, right?" Damon's eyes were cruel as he threw her own words back at her, and it felt like she had been slapped in the face. But before she could say anything, he started again. "Look, it's better this way. I will no longer be in the way of you and your perfect little boyfriend and your perfect, little, delusional life. 'It's Stefan, it's always going to be Stefan,' remember? Well, now you two will be able to be together without his pathetic older brother complicating things."

Elena closed her eyes painfully. His words were eating away at her and she desperately wanted them to stop. "Damon, don't do this."

"No, you don't do this. You can't have it all. You can't be in love with Stefan and then string me along on the side. I'm not doing that again, Elena. I've been pining over my brother's women for centuries and it's getting really fucking old."

Elena threw up her hands in aggravation. It wasn't like that and he knew it. "I'm not stringing you along!" she screamed.

Damon scoffed as if he'd been badly offended. "Then what the hell do you call what we've been doing for the past five months, Elena?" As she opened her mouth to speak, he cut her off once again. "You know what? Don't answer that. I am so sick of you and your 'Damon is just a friend' bullshit I could scream. Every fucking person in Mystic Falls knows that is a god damn lie, Elena, including you." He paused then, taking a step toward the young girl. She shook her head violently and he almost laughed. Almost. "Oh, I know you know it, you're just too fucking scared to admit it to yourself. And I'll be damned if I sit around and watch you live your life in denial, hoping that one day you'll grow up and face head-on what's looking you right in the eye."

Elena took a deep breath as she tried to think of a way to make Damon understand how hard all of this was for her. This wasn't something she knew how to deal with for god sakes. It's not like she had ever fallen in love with two different people at the same time before. How would she ever know what she was supposed to do? One part of her, the smart and logical part, knew that being with Stefan was the right choice. The safe choice. The choice that she should make. But the other part of her, the part that was so desperate to find that passion and all consuming love, knew that the man standing before her was the one she wanted; the one she needed. But how could she let Stefan go? How could she let either one of them go? She loved them for different reasons, and it was selfish, she knew that, god she knew that, but she wanted them both. "Damon, it's just. . .it's complicated," she whispered weakly.

This time the vampire did laugh, but there was no humor to the noise. "You know, you keep saying that, Elena, but you seem to be the only one. I know what I want." He stalked towards her until her back was against the wall, his eyes filled with so much intensity and emotion she found it hard to breathe "Stefan knows what he wants." His eyes turned hard now, and Elena looked down, not being able to stand his piercing gaze. She should have known it would never be that easy, not with Damon at least. He grabbed her chin forcefully, leading her head upwards until their eyes were locked. It seemed like they had been staring at each other for hours until he finally spoke, his voice low and almost pained. "The only person who doesn't know what they want is you."

Their close proximity was making it hard for Elena to concentrate on anything other than the man in front of her and the lips mere inches away from hers. She looked down at his perfectly shaped mouth, something she found herself doing a lot when she was around him, and then back up into his eyes. "Damon. . ."

The vampire quickly dropped her chin and took a step back, almost as if he had been burned. The moment had been broken, and he suddenly remembered why he was here. "Oh, but I'm so sorry, Elena. I forgot. You do know what you want. And like you promised, it's Stefan." He ran a hand through his raven colored hair and sighed defeatedly. "I'm not going to delude myself into thinking otherwise anymore. We all know how well that turned out before," he muttered, and both of their minds flashed to the phone call they had shared minutes before both of their lives changed forever.

Elena wanted to say something. She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry. She wanted to stomp her foot like a five year old and throw a tantrum. None of this was fair. She had gone out of her way to make sure both Salvatores stayed in her life forever, and now, after everything, the one brother she thought would never leave her was doing just that. "Can we please just talk about this?" she begged. "I know none of this is fair to you, Damon, but I need you." The tears were back, and normally they would have Damon eating out of the palm of her hand. But not this time. No, Damon was done. He was so fucking done with Elena Gilbert.

He walked to the door and stood with his back to her. "There's nothing else to say, Elena. I leave when you've learned how to take care of yourself. Case closed."

Panic swept through her as she realized how serious he was. He was leaving her. For good. She flew across the room to him, afraid that he was going to disappear before her eyes. She grabbed his arm and tugged mercifully. He was stronger than her, they both knew it, but he allowed himself to be turned around to face her anyway. "Please don't go," she whimpered. "You promised."

Damon inaudibly sighed. He should have known she would use that against him. Elena was never up for discussing her previous actions, but she would gladly rehash every damn word _he_ had ever _said_ to her and every damn thing _he_ had ever _done_ for her. He watched her as she ruthlessly wiped at her eyes, unsuccessfully trying to hide the tears that were silently rolling down her face. "Elena," he breathed, causing her to look up, hope shining in those beautiful brown orbs of hers. The hope was quickly replaced with more tears as he spoke. "I made you that promise when Stefan was on his ripper binge and was out of control. Bunny-eating Saint is back, and he'll be able to take care of you," he said carefully. He sure as hell wasn't going to mention the fact that soon enough, she too would be a vampire and could easily take care of herself.

Elena shook her head vigorously. Damon was wrong. No one would ever be able to protect her like he did. "But you promised," she said stubbornly.

Damon gently grabbed the sides of her face, his overall cold demeanor softening slightly. "This is the right thing to do," he said quietly. "You'll be better off without me. I promise." As the words left his mouth, he realized just how true they really were. If he was gone he would no longer be able to hurt her, to disappoint her, to not live up to her expectations.

Elena latched on to the back of his neck, slowly pulling his head downwards until their foreheads were barely touching. "You can't promise me that when we both know it's not true," she murmured mostly to herself. They stood like that, in complete silence, until Damon let go of her face and separated her hands from behind his neck. He placed a chaste kiss on her forehead before turning away. The loss of contact physically pained him, but he knew this is what he had to do. He had to let her go.

He placed his hand on the doorknob, ready to leave behind the one person who had made him feel human in his entire one hundred and fifty year existence. The girl who was so infuriating he wanted to rip his hair out 99.9% of the time, and the same girl who was so beautiful, inside and out, it made him want to be a better man because of it. "I can't do this anymore, Elena," he said finally. He craned his neck to look at her, his hand still poised on the knob. Their eyes met and he knew then that these feelings he had for her would never go away. How could they? But he had to move on. He had to at least try to get back to a time in his life when he was in control and every move he made wasn't dictated by Elena Gilbert. He smiled grimly before shrugging his shoulders. "Whatever this is, it's not fair to you, and it's not fair to Stefan."

The walls broke and Elena was sobbing again, clutching wildly at the heart she could feel breaking. She gasped for air as Damon turned away for the final time. His hand grasped the door tightly as his heart fought off every urge to run to her side and comfort her. He took a deep breathe before saying the one thing no one had seemed to understand, or maybe, the one thing no one had chosen to acknowledge throughout the entire mess they had made. "And it's sure as hell not fair to me."


End file.
